Monday, September 5, 2011

The end of life as I know it...

In other words, I had a birthday yesterday (and thank you to all of you who wished me a happy one on FB- it really was great!). It was the big 3-0. Yikes!

And while this might come off as a bit melodramatic, to be honest, I'm having a hard time coming to grips with it. My age. I realize that 30 is NOT old by any means. But it does mean I'm getting older. And I think what has be freaked out the most is that I'm not where I thought I'd be at this age. Don't get me wrong, I'm not in a bad place at all. Quite the contrary. I've got a great life, a wonderful husband, the best daughter, a nice home. It's just not quite what I pictured, you know?
And I certainly wouldn't trade it for anything! It's just... different than what I imagined.
I guess I thought I'd be more "grown up," done having our kids, working, living elsewhere, etc. I know this is just rambling and not making any sense. Hell, it doesn't even make sense in my own brain... it just is what it is I guess. It's silly, really, to have a hard time with a birthday. They're inevitable. Every year.

Maybe my problem is that time is just moving too fast? Maybe it's that I need to stop and savor the moments I'm given instead of dwelling on what isn't? Probably...

6 comments:

Shannon said...

Happy Birthday!! I feel the same way - every year I wonder when I'll feel like I'm leading a normal, grown-up life. But apparently not yet. I'm having a harder time with the years as they slowly creep towards 40. I even forget how old I am on many occasions!

Andrea said...

Happy Belated B-day :)

I didn't have a hard time turning 30 this year but it did make me realize that life is passing by and I AM getting older. I just never thought I'd ever leave my 20's. I can't fathom being my parents age and this was the year I realized one day I WILL be in my 50's! Such a crazy thought.

someday-soon said...

Sorry the big 3-0 is being tough on you. I just turned the big 3-6 if that helps you feel any better =) Time marches on....

Happily Married said...

I hear ya. First, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! Everyone has a certain birthday that hits them hard and makes them take stock of where they currently are. Mine happened to be 25. It's not being pessimistic to say that you thought you'd be in a different place than you are now at this birthday. I wish you nothing but the best in the coming year. I hope that you're able to move towards each of your goals as you enjoy this time.

Kimmygintx said...

Happy belated! I turned the big 3-0 myself in May and I don't feel much different myself. ;)

Welcome to the new decade!

Melissa said...

Happy 30th birthday, Tiff! I turned 30 a year-and-a-half ago and I have to admit that 30 was my "scary age" as well, but it isn't so bad! You have a lot of great things going on for you and you are so very blessed. Enjoy this fabulous new decade!