Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Me

Well this is me... I'm 26 (27 in a few very short months) and S and I are TTC our first (again). This has been such a long disappointing journey so far, I figured I might as well join the masses and document the rest of it. Who knows? Maybe this will be a little theraputic? I highly doubt it, but I guess as time goes on people can check in on us...

So here it is June 18, 2008 at 3:45 pm. I am at work (where else?) wasting time (what's new?) starting this blog... Oh joy! Actually I am kind of looking forward to having a place to jott (sp?) down my thoughts or rant and rave to my heart's content!

A little background (just in case a random person somehow discovers this and wants to know):

We lost our first child, G almost 4 yrs ago at 24w on July 20, 2005.
We discovered at our 20w u/s that there were some problems- not enough amniotic fluid, not enough chord vessels, non functioning (what they thought) kidneys, delayed growth. There we were anticipating finding out the sex, finding out everything was measuring fine only to find out things were NOT alright at all. All this led to an amnioscentesis (sp?) which led to the dx of Triploidy which is where you end up getting 3 sets of every chromosome instead of just 2 (think down's to the 64th degree!)- obviously non-conducive with life.
You can imagine, we were heartbroken, having already come to love and anticipate this child! On July 20, 2005 we went into the hospital and gave birth (well at least I gave birth, Scott was there holding my hand) to baby G. He was about 1lb and 8 in long. It is the saddest, most horrible day I have ever had to endure! It has been (and at times still is) a long mourning process. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about the child I lost :(
Since then we have been on this TTC road a couple of times-4 or 5 months in 2006 (before S left for Texas/ Lackland), 4 months in 2007 (before S left for Iraq) and now- on month 9 cycle 7 (almost 8). Collectively? We have been at this a long time... longer than I would have thought. But I guess I know it's all in God's time, not mine. When we are ready and His time is right, we will be blessed! I know it!
Until then all we can do is wait, try, pray and hope...

1 comment:

Teresa said...

Oh my gosh! I didn't know. When you commented me and said you lost your son I was so confused so I decided to go back to when you first started. I am beyond words sorry. I can't even imagine and I'll never ever understand why things like this happen. I'm sure he was beautiful and wow I am just so so so sorry :(