Monday, July 21, 2008

In Memorium

Four years ago yesterday, I was lying in a hospital bed. Four years ago I lost my son.
Happy Birthday Gabriel! You are loved and missed.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about him. Most days, I am okay, but days like yesterday and Mother's Day, I get pretty emotional. Batman kep me busy and occupied all day, taking me to a movie. He's a good man! It's weird to think that if Gabriel hadn't had triploidy, we would have a 4 yr old today. I would be a mom. Batman would be a dad. Oh how our lives would be different.
It's hard sometimes to see what God's plan is, but I do know that no one could be taking better care of my son than Him. That gives me peace. I know one day I will see him and until then I will remember my son's face, however imperfect it was, and be happy for the few moments I had with him, carrying him in my belly, feeling his soft flutters of movement, loving every bit of him.
I love you baby. Mommy misses you!

3 comments:

Andrea said...

Aww hon..stay strong. You will be a wonderful mommy one day.

And you're right. God is taking care of your precious son and you will see him again!

Jen said...

I just started reading your blog. I wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss.

You will be in my thoughts and try to stay strong.

Ophelia said...

{{{BIG HUGS}}} I'm here for ya hun